I’m back!
I missed the last 2 weeks. I kind of forgot what life is like with a newborn. You wouldn’t think I would considering this is the 5th kiddo, but I did.
I’m trying a new format this week. Rather than a long quote, I’m just picking one good habit then working through how to adopt it. Let me know what you think.
The Power of Habit
In his book “The Power of Habit” author Charles Duhigg investigates “why we do what we do in life and business”. Unsurprisingly from the title, it’s a book about the hidden habits in our lives and how they have an outsized influence on what we do. Great book, I highly recommend it. I’ve reference it often in my work as an executive consultant as I work with leaders to help change organizational behaviors.
As Duhigg illustrates in the book, a habit is a loop. It is a trigger, followed by an action, completed with a reward. There is neurochemistry at play, to offload some of the calorie intense work our brains need to do to process actions. Habits are ways that our brains minimize processing power for routine events. If I back the car up everyday, I should be able to conserve calories and not think about it after a few times. After a few conscious attempts (roughly 60) I don’t have to think when I back up the car, I just do it. I don’t have to think how to tie my shoes now, it just happens.
Keystone habits
In one chapter, Duhigg investigates what he calls “keystone habits”. These are
“small changes or habits that people introduce into their routines that unintentionally carry over into other aspects of their lives.”
In the last few weeks I’ve become acutely aware of one of my keystone habits, or with the loving disruption of a newborn, the lack of it.
Most people know that newborns sleep when they feel like it. We’ve been lucky with our newest little one, because he sleeps at night! But, I still wake up more tired than normal life with 5 kids. And in the last 3 weeks I haven’t been waking up when I normally do to get my morning workout in. That’s the missing keystone habit.
What is the habit?
Daily exercise. It can be short or long, the key is consistency. In the last few years I’ve found that I have to do it before the kids wake up. Otherwise I just don’t get to it. Depending on your schedule it could be quite different for you.
Why is it important?
Keystone habits are habits that form the basis for other good or bad behaviors. I noticed years ago that I was bitter and jealous of my former classmates. I also realized it coincided closely with how much time I spent snooping around their profiles on Facebook. Going on Facebook was a keystone habit, that led to other habits for me of jealousy and bitterness. So I cut out the keystone and deleted Facebook. The jealousy basically disappeared.
Similarly, morning exercise is a good keystone habit for me. To be clear, I kind of hate exercising, particularly early in the morning, but I know its benefits. When I don’t exercise (like I’ve been doing the last few weeks) I’m:
Less likely to sleep well
More likely to snack before lunch
More likely to reach for a beer before dinner
Less likely to go to bed on time.
So in my move to get a few more winks in the morning, I actually sacrifice some immediate and long term benefits. The good habit needs to come back.
How can you adopt it?
I’ll write about this in another post, but the best way to adopt a new habit is to remove as many obstacles as possible and connect it to a reward.
So to get back to my morning workouts, I will:
set out my workout clothes and shoes the night before (trigger and obstacles)
and put the delicious protein shake on the counter before I go to bed (reward)
Lean on the system, not your will power. Especially at 5 in the morning. Find your keystone habits and if they’re good lean on them. If a bad keystone habit (we all do!) take it off and be clothed with Christ instead!
Go be salty.
Until soon,
-Nate